To Live and Love
by stop and go
Summary: Snapshots of Severus Snape's life at Hogwarts include his sorting, his classes, his friends, his enemies and unbelievably, his quest for love. Pre DH.
1. Introductions and Presents

**To Live and Love**  
_Written by Stop and Go_

_---_

September 1st had arrived, bringing along a new terrified group of first years through the doors of Hogwarts. Among the new wizards was a greasy haired boy near the back of the group. The other children kept away from him. _He's weird_, the others whispered amongst themselves, _Severus Snape is so weird!_ He did not care however; the boy knew his knowledge of magic far surpassed any other person in the group. _That's all that will matter in the end, _he thought to himself, justifying his social inept. His beady black eyes looked at the floor in front of him. What sort of humiliation awaited him in this castle?

"Hello there!" a voice from behind Snape called brightly. He looked up to see a pretty redhead extending her hand to his. "I'm Lily Evans."

Snape hesitated before taking her hand in his. Girls like _her_ never talked to boys like _him._ "I'm Severus Snape."

She flashed him a wide smile. "Do you know anything about the sorting? Only both my parents are muggles so I don't really know what to expect…"

"Sorry, I haven't heard anything."

"Oh, that's quite alright. I was just hoping …" she replied with a disappointed air. In the distance someone shouted her name and Lily excused herself, promising that they would talk later.

_Did that really happen?_ Snape thought to himself. _She talked to me! Me!_

Slowly the group formed a single line and filed into the Great Hall. Many first years gasped and stood in awe of the sight in front of them. The hall was decorated in the colors of the four houses and the long tables were filled with students chatting animatedly to each other. Most had never seen such a spectacular and warm place as this. The older students glanced at the incoming students with slight interest before turning their attention to a tattered hat upon a chair. That's when the hat's brim opened and sang –

_"With just one quick glance at this hat,__  
You might just think I'm plain.  
But I am here to assure you that,  
__I am not the same.  
I am the Hogwarts Sorting Hat,  
And I have just one task.  
Though many of you know this,  
Still some of you may ask.  
I divide you - I will sort you,  
Into houses, there are four.  
So come on, step on forward,  
While I tell a little more.  
Perhaps in Gryffindor you'll find,  
Is where that you belong.  
If you're brave and noble then,  
This house will not be wrong.  
Or maybe you reside in Hufflepuff,  
Where loyalty rules all.  
Those joining are the patient few,  
Who will answer to your call.  
The third of all the houses,  
Is clever Ravenclaw.  
For here, those of learning,  
Will always conquer all.  
The last of Hogwarts' houses,  
Holds cunning in regard.  
These Slytherins will always win,  
By keeping up their guard.  
So come and give this hat a try,  
I promise you no harm.  
With the correct house and friends in tow,  
You'll succeed in spells and charms!"_

The hall burst into applause as students were called forward. Snape broke his gaze at the scene before him and returned to examining his shoes. When he heard, "Evans, Lily" sorted into Gryffindor, his summoned up all his courage. Perhaps he too would join Gryffindor.

"Snape, Severus!"

He scurried forward towards the chair and shoved the hat onto his head. Like a prisoner awaiting his sentence, Snape awaited the name of his house. He did not expect to hear a small voice inside his head.

"Ah, I see bravery in you. Intelligent, certainly but a thirst for power … Best be in SLYTHERIN!"

Snape opened his eyes to see an ocean of students on the far left rise up and applaud. He hurried over to the table and sat down next to a boy with extremely blonde hair and piercing gray eyes. From across the hall, he spotted the girl with the red hair sitting next to who he remembered as "Potter, James", "Black, Sirius" and "Lupin, Remus". He saw her laugh in delight at something someone said and felt hollowness in his gut.

"Vile Gryffindors. Their whole house is filled with mudbloods and blood traitors."

The blonde haired boy turned to him. "I'm Lucius Malfoy. Sixth year here."

Snape introduced himself.

Lucius smirked. "Snape is it? I've heard good things about you. Heard you're going to be one of the best in your year. Pity, the recruitments for our house this year were a bit disappointing." At this point, a frightened brunette boy moved down three seats towards his friend. "Shame that that Black boy became a Gryffindor but I always knew I didn't like him as much as his brother. My family knows their family well. At least _they_ have their priorities right. Keeping their bloodlines clean of any muggle filth that comes along. You are a pureblood, aren't you?"

"Yes," he lied.

The feast ended and the prefects were calling out to the first years to follow. Snape rushed past Lucius and towards the stairs leading down to the dungeon. In his haste, he accidentally knocked someone over, Lily Evans. He helped her up and she brushed off her robes.

"Thanks … Severus, isn't it?" She said, her green eyes looking pleasantly into his.

He nodded numbly.

"Well, I'll see you around then." Lily waved goodbye to him as James Potter whisked her away.

Severus Snape felt a small smile creep onto his face as he watched her leave. Perhaps Hogwarts wouldn't be so bad after all.

---

With the last day of classes before Christmas holidays coming to an end, everyone in the castle was filled holiday cheer. Hogwarts had outdone itself this year; huge pine trees covered with live fairies stood in every room, garlands of holly decorated the halls and every archway held mistletoe for unsuspecting students. Many students were saying goodbye and wishing each other a Happy Christmas.

Snape was not one of these students.

The Slytherin first year was headed towards the library, a safe haven away from the ridiculous antics of the other students. For some reason that he could not understand, Snape was _extremely_ unpopular among his peers. Most cast him wary looks and avoided him in the hallways. A few, on the other hand, teased him mercilessly. Most prominent were James Potter and Sirius Black.

In fact, these two were quickly becoming troublemakers-in-chief. Snape couldn't turn a corner without being hexed by Potter or Black. Of course, he couldn't take this sitting down. Perhaps Snape's tendency to jinx two of the school's most popular students earned him a reputation as a cold-hearted boy looking out only for himself. His life at Hogwarts had become anything but pure bliss.

Despite Lucius Malfoy being what he probably considered kind towards Snape, he felt rather alone in the looming castle. The kindest person he had met here barely spoke to him and recently kept far away from him. No doubt she had heard the stories Potter told to anyone who'd listen about Snape's 'cruel intentions'.

"Snape! HEY SNAPE!"

Usually, the voice that yelled this would belong to one of the Slytherin gang tracking him down to copy his homework. Other times, it belonged to Potter and Black chasing him down to cure their boredom. However, this voice was light and soft. It belonged to a gentle soul.

"What do you want?" Snape muttered beneath his breath. Lily Evans never came to him without leaving him hurt and confused.

She didn't flinch at his reply. Instead, she held out a beautifully wrapped box and smiled. When Snape didn't take it, Lily took his hand and placed the gift in it.

"Have a good holiday!" She chimed happily before walking away.

He watched her leave before turning to examine the small package in his hand. It was wrapped in golden paper that caught the light and was tied with red ribbon into a neat bow. _If Lucius saw me now … _He smirked but his expression softened when he unwrapped the gift.

Inside the box rested an ebony ring engraved with _S.S._ Snape scoffed. Lily clearly knew nothing about him.

But really, wasn't it the thought that counted?

---

End of the year exams passed in a blur. Severus Snape felt sure that he had passed each and every one of them. He had taken to studying in every spare moment of the day. No one found his studying schedule particularly strange. Snape _was_ anti-social. Also, spending his time in the library meant time away from Potter and Black who became increasingly annoying as the end of the year approached.

Now there were two people he couldn't wait to be rid of.

For now though, he was sitting underneath the large beech tree near the lake. His pale skin seemed to glow in the grass as he delved into a large book Lucius had lent him. He was struggling to concentrate though; Lily and her friends were a few feet away from him gossiping about the latest romances throughout the school.

Snape glanced upwards towards the group of girls and saw Lily looking defiant. _The sun makes her hair look pretty, _he thought to himself happily before realizing that if he voiced this out loud, he'd be a dead man. Then, against all good reason, he began to listen to their conversation, hoping to hear the lovely tinkling of her voice.

"That Sirius Black," a brunette girl began, "is so cute! He's got that long hair and _oh_ those eyes! And he's so charming and funny! I wonder if he even knows my name!" She giggled.

"Then say something when he's standing next to you!" Lily teased.

"Look who's talking Lily! Like you even utter a sound whenever James Potter is around." The brunette countered.

A look of disgust flashed across her face. "Potter? You think that I actually _like_ Potter? I find him an arrogant prick that needs to deflate his head. I swear, if he asks me out one more time … "

From beneath the beech tree, Snape smiled and returned to his book. A new thought crossed his mind that had him in the happiest mood he'd been in all day.

After all, its not everyday Severus Snape and Lily Evans find something in common.

---

**A/N: **It's been so long since I've written anything but I've got a good feeling about this one. Expect more soon. I'm on a roll.


	2. Vials and Qudditch

**To Live and Love**

_Written Stop and Go_

---

"_Double potions with the Gryffindors! You can't be serious!"_

The Slytherin second years had settled into their seats in the dungeon, sneering at the scarlet and gold clad students opposite of them. To everyone in the room, their current situation was preposterous; Dumbledore really didn't expect them to get along for the entire morning, did he?

After a few moments, Professor Slughorn arrived. As head of Slytherin, he exuded his house's characteristics and yet he still favored many other students in other houses. His favorite students (despite Slughorn's vain attempts to persuade everyone that he did not have favorites) formed 'The Slug Club'. Snape, fortunately, was not a member of the club.

"Welcome back to Hogwarts!" Slughorn announced cheerfully at the students before him. "Hopefully you remember everything you learned last year!" Snape smirked as several students looked guilty. "Ah, I see many have had exciting summers! No matter, I have prepared for this. Today's lesson will be on the many uses of salamander blood!"

Snape rolled his eyes. Really, the uses of salamander blood? Who in the room didn't already know the uses of salamander blood? Slughorn really underestimated his year.

"It makes a potion red?" Someone replied meekly to a question about the effect of the blood.

Then again, maybe Slughorn knew exactly what he was doing.

As the lecture ended, Slughorn introduced the second part of their lesson - to create one potion from a list of six on the board. _Easy_, Snape thought to himself as he gathered ingredients.

Snape chose the most difficult potion on the list and began filling his cauldron with all sorts of different items. As the end of class approached, he was nearly complete. All that was left was to add a dash of peppermint and stir counterclockwise two more times. He stood to go search for some in the cupboard but found it completely empty.

"Here, I took some extra." A small hand shoved some strong smelling peppermint into his face. When he didn't say anything, she dropped it onto the table and left exclaiming, "The least you could do is say thank you!"

He picked up the sprig and watched her glide away. Lily Evans, Snape had decided over the summer, didn't walk but glided towards her destination. He had also decided that even though Lily was a Gryffindor, she was almost, _nearly_, close to bearable.

Which, coming from a Slytherin, was almost, _nearly _a compliment.

Snape walked back to his bubbling cauldron but felt distracted from the recent event. He added the peppermint to his potion haphazardly and stirred. Across the room, Lily corked a vial of her completed potion and was showing it to Slughorn.

"My word, Miss Evans! Excellent job! Someone clearly has been studying this summer!" Their professor exclaimed.

Snape's potion, on the other hand, began to emit a thick fog and spill over the edges of his cauldron. Hurriedly, he tired to salvage what he could of his now ruined potion but it overflowed so quickly that nearby students jumped up onto their chairs.

And suddenly, the potion vanished from the cauldron and from the floor.

"Snape!" Snape looked up to see a smiling Professor Slughorn. "I see you were a bit overenthusiastic with the stirring. It was a good effort though, just … not quite good enough." Slughorn patted Snape on the shoulder before announcing to the class that the lesson was done and to bring up a sample of their potion to the front for grading.

Snape scowled. He did not enjoy being humiliated in front of the class. _Especially in front of Lily_, he thought involuntarily. He cleaned up his workspace and left for lunch.

"Hey _Snivelly_." James Potter and Sirius Black had finally caught up to him in the hallway.

He groaned inwardly. Potter _ingeniously_ arrived at that nickname on the Hogwarts Express and Black had eagerly announced it as Snape's new name. What did the school see in these two prats?

"What do you want Potter? If I'm not mistaken, lunch is starting soon and I'm hungry."

"Dear, dear. Learn your manners Snape," Black retorted, pulling his wand out.

Potter followed suit. "Really Snivellus, someone might think that you don't like us and that's just insane."

"It's insanity that anyone here actually likes you," Snape said in a cold voice while pulling out his own wand.

Professor Slughorn walked out of his classroom and saw three boys about to engage in what promised to be a rather violent duel. He hesitantly tried to diffuse the situation. "Boys, boys, boys. Shouldn't you be in the Great Hall enjoying your lunch? C'mon, let's move … "

The three boys pocketed their wands and with a final sneer at each other, headed to lunch.

---

To much of the school, the fact that Severus Snape had found his niche at Hogwarts was unbelievable. Lucius Malfoy had taken him under his wing and had introduced him to his own friends. Unfortunately, this group was well known throughout the school for their involvement with the dark arts. _Poor Severus Snape,_ they'd say. _Doesn't he have enough troubles without getting mixed up with that crowd?_

Deep down, Snape really did want to fit in with the other students. He longed to have the respect and friendship of his peers. Although he would never admit it, Snape wanted to live the life of the ever popular James Potter and Sirius Black.

Which is why he was standing on the quidditch pitch in front of the Slytherin quidditch team.

"Next up! Come on, I haven't got all day!" the captain, a strong jawed boy named Evan Tibuleri, called to the crowd.

With his broom clutched in his hand, Snape stepped forward onto the field. Tibuleri nodded towards him and Snape kicked off the wet grass into the air. Out of nowhere, a bludger flew at him and soared right over his head, missing him by just a few inches. In return, Snape let out a high-pitched squeal.

Somewhere below, four boys let out obnoxious laughs. The 'Marauders', as the school now called the foursome, were rolling around in hysterics. Snape tried furiously to block out the sounds as he caught the quaffle in outstretched arms. In his anger, he tried to get the ball past the keeper but missed the hoops by a good few feet.

Beneath him, Sirius Black yelled out a sarcastic, "Don't give up!" The three others applauded.

Snape's blood began to boil as he caught the quaffle again for his second attempt at future popularity. Looking through curtains of greasy hair, he hurled the ball towards the left hoop. Unlike his first attempt, the keeper had to move to block his shot. It was an improvement in everybody's eyes.

Tragically, it would not last. His last three shots nearly hit onlookers below him. The Marauders were having a field day. As Snape landed on the dewy grass, the Slytherin captain gave him a look of pity before saying, "You'd better stick to those books of yours Snape."

Snape grimaced. The tryout couldn't have gone worse unless he wished it to. _That's the last time I ride a broom,_ he thought to himself bitterly, throwing his broom aside.

"Snivelly! Wait up!"

He turned to see Sirius Black carrying his broom for him and the other three boys following behind. Each carried looks of sympathy.

"Snivellus, that tryout must have been fixed!" Black said anxiously, handing back Snape's broom.

"Yeah, everybody could see that you were the best choice out there," Lupin added with fake sincerity.

Potter got down onto his knees. "Please, Snivelly! Will you teach me to fly as well as you for my tryouts tomorrow? I just don't know what I'll do if I humiliate myself like some greasy haired Slytherin!"

Peter Pettigrew nearly burst into fits of laughter. "Snape, you were brilliant! The Slytherin team lost a valuable player!"

The four left Snape by the bleachers, still remarking on his inept ability to play quidditch. He cursed all of them, particularly Potter. _Tomorrow, _he thought to himself,_ he'll see that it's not as easy as it looks. He'll embarrass himself at his tryouts tomorrow. There's no way he's any good! There just can't be any possible way!_

The following day, Snape watched through a window as James Potter received his quidditch uniform and became the newest addition to the Gryffindor team.

_Unbelievable,_ he thought to himself. _This is getting ruddy unbelievable_.

---

It was a fresh spring morning, the day of the final qudditch match. It would be between Gryffindor and Slytherin and also decide which house received the coveted qudditch cup. Both teams had defeated Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff and were widely regarded as some of the best teams ever put together at Hogwarts.

Snape was eating his breakfast, dressed in green and silver in support of his house. Although he wasn't going to play, he doubted whether anyone in house wanted them to win more than him. Potter was getting ridiculously confidant and no one wanted to see him fail more than Snape.

James Potter arrived in the Great Hall with a large group following him. He had a large grin on his face as he took a seat next to Lily. She ignored him and continued chatting to her friends. Snape smirked when he saw a disappointed look on Potter's face.

The reason Snape did not mind Lily Evans as much as the other Gryffindors was that she didn't kiss Potter and Black's feet. She refused to go weak at the knees every time Potter rumpled his hair or Black flashed her a smile.

Still, she was a Gryffindor and supported her team enthusiastically. She sported a scarlet and gold scarf, hat, and a Gryffindor pin on her robes. When the team rose to leave, she chimed "Good luck everybody!"

Potter grinned wickedly. "Hey Evans, how about a kiss for good luck?"

He walked out of the Great Hall with a red handprint on his cheek.

The best thing that could be said about that match was that it was short. The Slytherin team lost their nerve and resorted to what the Gryffindors called "outright, bloody cheating!" At the end of twenty minutes, with a score of 70-0 to Gryffindor, the snitch was caught and the match ended. A sea of scarlet and gold flooded the quidditch pitch and in the center, James Potter held the large cup above his head as he had contributed five goals in that game and the hero of the game.

Snape, of course, was as unhappy about their loss as any other Slytherin. However, a scene that just occurred made him the most miserable Slytherin in the whole school.

Lily Evans, after pushing her way through the crowd of fanatical students, threw her arms around James Potter and gave him a very swift kiss on the cheek before being swept away by a wave of quidditch cup winners.

---

**A/N**: Second chapter, second year. Starting to catch the pattern? I'm trying to keep the story as accurate as possible but I'm not so sure if James really did join the quidditch team in his second year, but it worked for our purposes. Sorry if there's some awkward wording in this, I rushed a bit to get this up. So far though, I'm really excited and happy about the way this story is turning out. I've got loads of ideas. Anyways, please **review**! It really does make my day!

Oh, and I'd like to thank Flipflopper333 and Korquee for reviewing chapter one!


	3. Hogsmede and Astronomy Charts

**To Live and Love**

_Written by Stop and Go_

---

It was September 1st again and Snape sat alone in a compartment on the Hogwarts Express. Outside, the rain fell in fat drops and students were hurrying onto the platform. For most, finding and keeping their own private compartment was nearly impossible. Different groups of friends often shared the small rooms. For Snape however, it was as simple as arriving early and walking into the first open compartment. Nobody wanted to sit with Severus Snape.

The previous year, Snape had sat with Lucius Malfoy and Narcissa Lestrange. They simply threatened anyone who came anywhere near them. Unfortunately, they had graduated from Hogwarts the previous year. Snape was to face his third year alone.

"Absolutely not Lily!"

"Come on! There's no other seats left. He's not even _that_ bad."

"Oh really! The whole school begs to differ! Either way, there's still no way I'm ever sitting by _him_!"

"Seriously, where else are we going to sit? Up front with the driver?"

"You think they'd let us?"

"Come on …"

His compartment door slid open and Lily Evans stuck her head in, her auburn hair swept back and her green eyes sparkling. She exuded confidence or rather an I'm-not-afraid-to-hex-you persona.

"Hey Snape. Do you mind if Sarah and me sit in here? There's really no other open compartment."

Snape shrugged half-heartedly. Lily ushered her friend Sarah in before taking a seat next to Snape. The two completely ignored him as they began a conversation about their summers.

Inside, he felt like dancing.

The remainder of the ride was uneventful. When the lunch trolley came, Lily asked Snape if wanted anything of the cart. He was too nervous to answer her and instead gave her a glare. He then turned towards the window to watch the rolling landscape fly by.

Towards the end of the ride, the pair's conversation turned toward the upcoming Hogsmede trips. Snape knew that both Lily and Sarah were muggleborn and had no idea what to expect. He had been there only once before with his mother while the vacationed across the country. Honestly, he was not impressed with the tiny village.

"It's a whole magical community. The only one in Britain! I can't believe we're finally getting to go!" Lily exclaimed.

"I wonder what's there. Is it anything special? Anything different than Diagon Alley?" Sarah asked to no one in particular.

Snape chose to take this opportunity to join their conversation. "Well actually, there's a lot different from Diagon Alley and Hogsmede. Hogsmede has got The Three Broomsticks, one of the most famous bars in Britain. Then there's Zonko's and The Shrieking Shack, the most haunted building in England."

Sarah stared at him, dumbfounded. Snape wasn't supposed to talk to them! What would happen if someone saw the trio actually _conversing_? It was all too scandalous for Sarah.

"Shut up you greasy haired git!" Sarah shrilled loudly.

Lily shot her a look before turning towards Snape. "Thanks Severus but maybe it's better if you don't say anything. I don't mind, of course, but if someone saw you, they might get a bad idea and make your life at Hogwarts worse than it already is."

He nodded in agreement before turning back to the window. Ignoring the now darkening sky, a signal to change into their school robes, Snape instead thought over what Lily had said.

She didn't mind, of course, if they spoke. She didn't want his life at Hogwarts to be worse than it already was. She had even used his first name!

Snape _hated_ his name. He hated the way his mother had shortened it to Sevvy and how it had been so easy to turn into Snivellus. He hated the way his parents used his name as they argued in his home in Spinner's End, his father always blaming his mother for their current situation. The sound of his name reminded him of dirt and how the rain turned it to mud.

Yet, here he was on the Hogwarts Express, loving the way his name sounded as the pretty redhead girl with sparkling green eyes said it.

---

The trees had changed colors, exhibiting vibrant reds and lush oranges. Autumn fell on Hogwarts and with it, the first Hogsmede trip of the year. Third years in particular were excited, as it would be their first trip to the wizarding village. Even Snape managed to smile as he stepped into a carriage headed towards Hogsmede.

His smile vanished immediately when he realized he was not alone. The Marauders occupied this carriage and seized the opportunity of seeing Snape alone. Immediately, the taunts and teasing began as all five pulled out their wands.

"On your way to Hogsmede looking like that, Snape?" Pettigrew asked in his high, squeaky voice. He looked around nervously at his three friends for approval.

"Yeah Snape. Most people would think that they'd shower or something before they left," Black added as Potter and Lupin laughed.

"Shove off," Snape replied half-heartedly, stuffing his wand into his pocket. He climbed out of that carriage and looked for another.

As the carriage sped away, Potter yelled out, "We'll buy you some shampoo at Hogsmede, dear Snivelly!"

Snape ignored him and climbed into a parked carriage nearby. Again, he found this one occupied with another Gryffindor. Lily looked out the window as Potter's carriage rolled away and only just noticed that a new person had intruded her privacy.

The two locked eyes, daring each other to speak first. In the midst of silence, Lily asked angrily, "Well? Aren't you going to sit? This carriage isn't going to leave unless everyone's sitting!"

"Sorry," he muttered in reply as he hurriedly took his seat.

Silence overwhelmed the pair again. Lily glanced occasionally at Snape who was determinedly keeping his eyes fixed on his shoes. The sunlight fell onto his pale hands, making him seem even more ghost-like than he already was.

"What's your problem with James Potter?" Lily asked him unexpectedly.

Snape merely looked at her for a few seconds. "Potter is the most obnoxious person I've ever met. He's arrogant and – and he struts around the school with his friends thinking that he's better than everyone."

"But he's sort of _nice_ isn't he? He's proven that he's a gifted wizard. You were there in Transfiguration that day where he turned his mouse into a teacup on the first try. He's really talented!" Lily argued.

"He's got lucky. The only reason everyone thinks he's so 'talented' is because he can throw a ball into a hoop. That's not talent. Anyone could do that. I'm surprised he can walk around with such a huge head."

Lily let out a little laugh. Snape thought it sounded like tinkling bells.

"Of course you'd bring quidditch into this. You're still upset about Gryffindor winning the quidditch cup _and_ the house cup last year! Admit it!" Lily replied, the corners of her mouth twitching upwards.

Snape looked at her in amazement. "What? That's got nothing to do with it! I could care less about quidditch!"

"Really. So is that why you tried out for your team last year? You're bitter about being rejected aren't you?"

"What do you know anyways? You don't know anything about me." He turned crimson. She had no idea why he hated James Potter.

"Oh I know plenty Snape," Lily began." I know your favorite subject is Potions but Slughorn doesn't see how good you are at it. Once, in Herbology, you accidentally touched Devil's Snare and Sprout had to save you from it. You adore chocolate ice cream, especially from Fortescue's. You once had a black owl named Brutus, but it was injured and sent home. Anything else?"

"How do you know all of that?" He asked.

She smiled happily. "I just notice little things here and there. Like how I saw you at Diagon Alley buying your school supplies and I saw you order about three chocolate sundaes. Things like that."

The carriage stopped in front of a quaint village where oceans of students were wandering about. "Well, it's been a pleasure Snape. I'll see you around!" Lily said, climbing out of the carriage and meeting up with her friends Mary and Sarah.

"You have no idea Lily Evans," Snape whispered to the dead air long after Lily joined the rest of the student body.

---

Hogwarts' library was filled to its maximum. End of the year exams were approaching and students of all years were sitting in the library trying to study. Desks were covered with open books, bottles of ink and piles of parchment. In the silence of the library, the sound of scratching quills was deafening.

Snape sat at the desk in the farthest corner of the room and was reviewing his star chart, noting the position of Mars. He had enchanted the chart to move according to the time of day. It was a tremendous help in studying for his Astronomy exam. Many students cast him jealous looks as they saw what a treasure his chart was.

Suddenly, the chart flew out of his hands. It soared across two girls and landed in the hands of James Potter who grinned. The girls swooned as he rumpled his hair, pocketed the parchment, and walked away.

Snape was furious. He had spent hours on his chart, charming it to work effectively. To have someone steal it without a backwards glance infuriated him to no end. In his rage, he chased after Potter and confronted him in the hall outside the library.

"Give it back!" Snape cried, pulling out his wand.

"No way!" Potter said. He too had his wand out. "Why would I give back such a magnificent piece of parchment?"

Waving his wand threateningly, Snape said, "Give it here Potter. It's not my fault you weren't bright enough to make your own chart."

"I'm defiantly bright enough but why should I waste my precious time when someone else is willing to do it for me?" replied Potter, grinning.

"Accio chart!" yelled Snape as he pointed his wand at the opposite boy.

Just in time, Potter shouted, "Expelliarmus!"

Snape's wand flew out of his hand but not until the chart had landed at his feet. He hastily picked up the chart and ran after his wand.

"Petrificus Totalus!"

Before he could reach his wand, Snape's body snapped together and every muscle froze in place. Potter walked towards him and snatched the chart out of his hand.

"Thanks Snape. I'll be sure this gets put to good use."

Frustrated, Snape fought against invisible ropes in vain. All he could do now was wait for someone to come lift the curse. Luckily, help came in a few minutes in the shape of his beloved Lily Evans.

"Who did this to you?" she demanded of him.

"Who do you think? 'Saintly' James Potter! I can't believe people actually like him!" Snape replied as he stood up and grasped his wand.

Lily looked upset. "Potter? Really? I mean, he's arrogant and all but to actually hex somebody and leave them helpless …"

"Of course he'd hex someone! It's _James Potter!_ Why am I the only one who sees him for what he truly is? An average wizard who needs to feel important by tearing other people down!"

"He must have had a reason. He's not evil."

Snape was aggravated. Didn't she think that James Potter was obnoxious as well? "He stole my Astronomy chart! That lazy, son of a –"

"Your astronomy chart?" Lily understood. She had seen Snape's famed chart and she too was jealous. "He took it? Oh, don't worry Snape. I'll get it back for you. If it's the last thing I do."

"Er – thanks."

Without so much of a warning, Lily turned around and stomped off towards the Gryffindor common room, leaving Snape confused but feeling accomplished and happy.

Two days later, James Potter and Lily Evans lost 20 points from Gryffindor for fighting on the stairs. Snape had heard the whole story during dinner. His astronomy chart had been returned to him only minutes before and was currently tucked away in his pocket.

---

**A/N:** So, I'm sure you all have read HP7 by now! I am _so _happy with how everything turned out; excluding the fact the whole book was a complete bloodbath. Unfortunately for me, JKR has included many specific events in Snape's life concerning Lily that I didn't know when I began this so this story will continue **PreDH**. Obviously, it would be difficult to go back and accommodate the real version. This story is simply _my version_ of what could have happened.

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed this story so far. It really does make my day.

Also, I've written another story entitled **The Promise**. If you've got time, check it out and maybe leave a **review**. :D


	4. The Life Debt

**To Live and Love**

_Written by Stop and Go_

---

Confined in their last class of the day, another gloriously sunny day passed in a haze for the Gryffindor and Slytherin fourth years. History of Magic was easily the most _boring_ class Hogwarts offered and it was just their luck that it was a double period on a Friday. Professor Binns was teaching his students about the Statute of Secrecy Act.

Unfortunately, most students did not find the subject interesting whatsoever and many were just biding their time until they could drop the subject after O.W.L.'s. For now, they were mindlessly doodling on the edge of their parchment, engaging in conversations, or simply dozing through the lesson. Snape was one of the few students taking notes. He sat near the front of the room next to Lily Evans, who seemed to be the only other student paying attention.

It was one of the things he admired about Lily. Over the course of four years, Snape finally admitted to himself that he admired the Gryffindor but **that was all**. After all, not many Gryffindors, or girls for that matter, ever gave him the time of day. Lily on the other hand was _kind_ to him. She spoke civilly to him, she stuck up for him, hell she even gave him a Christmas present his first year! Of course he _admired_ her. But really, that's all it was – _admiration._

As Professor Binns rambled on, Snape felt his attention wavering. He glanced at the clock. _Dear Merlin, how could there possibly still be a whole hour left of this class!_ He looked around. In the back, most of the Slytherins were holding whispered conversations. Throughout the room, Snape counted six students sleeping and thirteen whose eyes were glazed over. Looking to his right, he saw Lily, concentrating intensely on Professor Binns. Behind her, sat three of the four marauders. Remus Lupin seemed to be missing.

He tried to go back to focusing on the lesson but the thought of Lupin missing class again distracted him. Lupin missed class every month and the teachers didn't seem to notice or care. In fact, now that Snape thought of it, Lupin missed class _every full moon_. And he always returned to class looking weary and ragged! Of course - _how dumb could he be? -_ Lupin was a werewolf! It all fit!

Struck by his genius, Snape yelled, "YES, I FIGURED IT OUT!"

The whole room silenced, the sleeping students awoke, and the dazed shook their heads and turned to look at the strange boy who had disrupted class. Professor Binns was only mildly surprised by the outburst and paused slightly while Snape apologized under his breath. One by one, students diverted their eyes and returned to their previous states of slumber with glazed eyes.

James Potter's eyes lit up mischievously. "Yes, well I was wondering when you'd finally figure out the joys of shampoo."

Peter Pettigrew sniggered and Sirius Black continued. "I'd give you some hair tips, but seeing as you've _just_ learned that washing it may help…"

Snape scowled and retorted with the only thing he could think of. "Where's your little friend, Lupin? Ill again, is he? Is it a long term illness, as he's gone every month at the full moon?"

Potter and Pettigrew shared nervous glances before Black replied coolly, "What's it to you Snape? Got a little crush on him, do you?"

"Will you _please_ shut up!" Lily hissed at them. She had tried ignoring their ongoing conversation but found she needed to say something. "So what if Lupin's out sick? There's no reason to start attacking him when he can't even defend himself."

Snape started to say something but was cut off by Potter saying, "We weren't attacking Moony! If anyone was attacking, it was Snape!"

"What the hell are you talking about Potter!? I was merely asking a simple question about him! You were the one who – "

"_Just shut up already!_" Lily whispered loudly. Then she promptly turned around and began taking notes on the lecture.

"Merlin Evans, we didn't mean to interrupt your precious note taking!'' Black shot back while Potter smiled and Pettigrew shrugged.

The remainder of class passed by uneventfully. Snape returned to the lecture and amazed himself by staying awake. Finally, the bell rung and everyone rose quickly towards their weekend freedom. Snape packed his bag and headed towards the door only to be stopped by an uncharacteristically serious Sirius Black.

"Listen Snape, what exactly do you know about where Lupin's been?"

Snape glared at him. "Why would you care Black?"

"Well, to be honest," Black began, looking uncomfortable, "I don't really know what's going on with him lately. James definitely knows, but he won't tell me. I mean, I'm supposed to be his best friend and he won't even tell me what's going on with Lupin!"

"I don't believe that," Snape replied, shifting his weight. Black was obviously lying… wasn't he? There was a hint of authenticity in his voice that Snape couldn't ignore.

"Alright, that's fair. But I wanted to tell you that I heard James talking about Lupin being moved tonight. Something about freezing a knot beneath the Whomping Willow and there being a passage behind it. I would go tonight myself but I've got detention with Filch…" Black explained.

Snape frowned. It was a plausible story and he did want to find out what was going on. "What time?"

The corners of Black's lips twitched as he said, "Eleven, tonight."

---

Hogwarts was chilly that night. The moonlight fell through the front door as Snape swooped onto the grounds, looking much like his older self. He made his way through the damp grass towards the Whomping Willow. At night, the tree looked like a monster and he felt as if he was walking straight towards his impending doom.

The knot that Sirius Black had told him about was hidden beneath the overgrown foliage where no person dared go. _Except for me, _he thought. Snape shot a spell towards it and suddenly, the tree stopped its branches and fell limp.

It was as if a light had been lit in front of him telling him where to go. In an instant, Snape was crawling through the small hole and emerged on the other side to find a dark passageway. He whispered "Lumos" and his wand lit up the passage. He followed it further down, his heart pounding against his chest. Behind him, he thought he heard a person's voice but ignored it. Curiosity had driven out any grain of logic left in him.

Snape continued further on, never once looking behind him. His wand shook causing shadows to be cast in all sorts of directions. Then suddenly, the smallest light appeared from far away and Snape knew that was where he was headed. His feet moved quicker when he heard someone yell his name behind him.

"SNAPE! DON'T GO DOWN THERE!"

In his surprise, Snape snapped his head around and saw James Potter sprinting towards him with his wand at the ready. Snape growled and ignored the warning and continued down the corridor. He saw a shadow in front of the light in the shape of an animal. The closer he got, the more he was sure that Lupin was a werewolf and that he would be transforming soon.

"FOR MERLIN'S SAKE SNAPE! TURN AROUND AND GET OUT OF HERE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!"

Potter had caught up to him at last and was now hauling Snape away towards the other end of the passage. Snape struggled against his captor's hold but Potter was much stronger than he ever knew. Together, the two ran when a loud growl echoed off the walls. Lupin had transformed and was now coming to chase after the pair.

"Bloody hell Snape!" Potter groaned as he ran. "What were you doing down here anyways?"

"I," Snape began, but stopped to catch his breath. There would be time later for explanations. Right now, he was trying to outrun a fully transformed werewolf.

Another louder growl followed them as the reached the door to the open grounds. Potter threw it open, pulled Snape through and slammed the door shut behind them. They were safe.

"What the hell were you doing here Snape?" Potter asked again.

Snape, still trying to catch his breath, answered, "Black told me that – never mind."

"You better get up to the school."

Without so much as a thank you, Snape left his 'savior' behind and headed back to the dungeons. A cold realization fell upon him as he walked through the halls, avoiding Filch. This had been an elaborate prank devised by Black to deliberately harm him! Possibly _kill_ him! It was certainly lucky that Potter was – wait – Potter knew about it the whole time! His sense of conscience finally caught up to him and he had to save Snape.

_Oh no_, he thought to himself as another realization hit him,_ oh no! He saved me?!_

Snape had a life debt to James Potter and there was nothing he could do about it.

---

"I heard what Sirius Black did to you last night," Lily told Snape during Charms the next morning. "It was really cruel of him. You're lucky James Potter was there or who knows what could have happened."

"James Potter just wanted to play the hero again. He just wanted the attention, like always," Snape replied coldly.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Potter is arrogant, I know, but you really don't think he'd save your life for attention. If he really wanted to, he would have saved Mary's life. To impress me. Saving you just proved that he has a soft spot for Slytherins."

"You know, you'd give Potter a run for his money in 'most arrogant Gryffindor,'" Snape said, in an almost teasing voice.

"Are you comparing me to James Potter?" She asked in a mock angry voice. "I've never been so insulted in my life."

"Don't take it personally Evans, I say it to all the Gryffindors."

The two burst out laughing before they realized who they were; she was a _Gryffindor_ and he a _Slytherin_ and it was just so wrong for them to be laughing like this. Laughing like they enjoyed each other's company and were friends. They could never be friends. That had be dictated the moment Snape was sorted into Slytherin.

And Lily Evans would never love Severus Snape. That had been decided the moment James Potter told the school that he fancied the girl with the sparkling green eyes. From that moment, Lily was off limits to anyone but James.

Snape found himself burning with rage towards Lily and James; one for leaving him with an aching heart and the other for not allowing him to do anything about it.

---

**A/N:** I never knew for sure what year James saved Snape. On HP Lexicon, it says his sixth year but in Deathly Hallows, JKR writes about it happening before Snape calls Lily a mudblood, which happens in their O.W.L. year. I decided to keep it in his fourth year as it made more sense to me for it to happen then.

I really want to thank everyone who reviewed the last chapter! You guys are the greatest! I hope you will **review** this chapter. I struggled with this chapter and I do like how it turned out.


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